♡ stronger ♡

I love my husband so much.

I have never love any guy like i love him.

I never thought i could actually, after my previous relationship ended.

I love him with all my heart.

He’s the best husband ever.

I have so many insecurities, so many meltdowns, a roller coaster of emotions, and yet he’s handling it well.

I have so many flaws, I’m not pretty, I’m not sexy, I’m not rich, and yet he’s still wanted to marry me.

I don’t know what he sees in me.

He’s patient, he made a lot of effort to be with me.

And I’m forever thankful for that.

When it comes to insecurities, every little thing that he does affects me.

Men. He’s just like any other man, who likes looking at pics of sexy girls, pretty girls.

And my husband is one of them.

He’s literally has followed all sexy and pretty girls on ig.

And this thing affects me the most

Because I’m not like those girls. Not even close.

And it makes me wonder, how can he love me when all he sees and watch are those girls.

I’ve told him about this, so many times, and nothing changes.

He follows new sexy girl frequently.

He stopped for awhile but then he did it again.

When I confronted him, he said he didnt remember follow them. And i know that’s a lie. He’s lying straight to my face.

It’s sad.

All i ask is i want to be respected as a wife.

I know he frequently likes girls photo, follow new girls, even dm them.

I know he’s still dming hanis hamid. Keciknya hati.

I trusted him with my whole heart, my whole life.

Kecewa, kecik hati, sedih.

Why would he still does the things that i hate?

Even Ive told him that i dont like he followed girls on ig, i dont like he’s dming them, i hate it.

But he still does it anyway.

Does any of my words ever mean anything to him?

Sometimes i wonder, did he ever love me?

Why did he even marry me if he’s going to hurt me like this?

He didnt event “touch” me, even when we had sex, he played with his phone.

What am i to him? 😭

kenapa i rasa dia tak sayang i?

Kenapa i rasa macam dia kahwin dengan i just for the sake of kahwin?

Bukan seikhlasnya sayang and cinta i?

He never love me ke?

I sayang and cinta suami i lebih sepenuh hati i, tapi entahla.

I think he feel disgusting with me, and ashamed of me as his wife. After i get pregnant, he didn’t even touch me.

This hurts me so much.

Thinking that the man i love with all my heart, might not love me the same way i do.

I’m sorry. For not being a wife you want.

The beautiful wife.

The sexy wife.

The hottest wife.

I’m so sorry.